Test: The Ultimate Sex Test (Warning, Extreemly graphic. Adults 18+ only)

Category: Relationship

Description: WARNING

Keywords: Sex

The average penis size in America is 6". Knowing that, I still consider myself to be pretty big.

True False

You are approached in a bar by two girls. They are drunk, and they want to party. One whispers in your ear that they are very wet and want to fuck, hard. Another then vomits all over your shoes. What do you do?

Tap that pussy, hard. Smack dat ass and put does hoes on a corner to make you some dough Take then back to your appartment, and punish them for being very naughty girls. Leave the bar, your wife/sig other is waiting.

You decide that it would be a good idea to fuck the office secretary. How do you go about doing this (her)?

Hit on her every day, trying not to creep her out. Casually ask her out to dinner, then invite her to your place. Realise that your sig other is always watching... you pussy. Grasp her hand, and lead her to the supply closet.

How often do you buy condoms?

Every week or more. About once every every two or three weeks. Once a month. Once a year. Never.

Do you consider yourself to be well endowed? (i.e. is your dick big/ pussy tight?)

Yes No

You realize one night that you haven't been laid in more than a month. You react by:

This has never happened to me. Feel sorry for yourself... and gorge yourself on ice cream. Jack off Cry yourself to sleep

I have had sex with more than ten women.

True False

You meet a girl who is very 'creative'. She is wearing a diaper, holding a paddle, and is in a school girl outfit with a short plaid skirt. She bends over a bench and whispers: "I've been bad." What do you do?

Spank her, fuck her, bang her, and screw untill dawn. Wish that she was a he. Are curious, but intimidated by this "indecency". Piss your pants and run away.

I jack off every night... even on weekends.

True False

You are in an airport, and you have a three hour layover so naturally, you go to the bar. You are sitting there and a (hot) flight attendant begins to hit on you. What do you do?

Take her to the men's airport bathroom without a second thought (about your wife). Take her to the Delta Crown Room... there you can get some privacy. Wonder how many guys she has fucked in the airport, but still bang her anyway. Politely inform her that you don't swing that way. Feel your wife/girlfriend crack the leash (and realise how whipped you are... pussy).

I saw a porno before age 10.

True False

Have you ever been involved in an orgy?

Yes No

I have been involved with a threesome involving a member of the same sex.

True False

You went out on the town with your girl/boy friend. You meet another couple who are feeling 'frisky'. They invite you to an orgy. You...

...turn and run the other way. are excited, and run all the way there. wonder how many willing men will be there? realise that it is getting late. You should head home.

You found yourself a girl, brought her home, and are fucking her. She reaches around to your ass and begins to fondle your anus. You...

Smack a bitch! Smack a bitch, hard! Like it... yummm Spank her

Comments

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